blatherings

blatherings
the shallow side

And a month goes by...

For the last month Jim and I have been working out - he’s shown me a great deal and is starting to be less available - which is understandable that he, oh I don’t know, has a life outside of me... So for the last two days I’ve gone on my own. It is a little daunting at first - some of the guys who work out there are actually in training - they’ll be fighting on the 9th in some big televised thing. And here I am, some chubby little chick who has only a basic understand of what to do. But on the other hand, these guys are so focused on what they’re doing, that they pay not a whit of attention to me, and while I might not know a great deal now, everyone starts somewhere, right? So, as it’s been a month, I am going in for a full spa pedicure today and have measured myself.... here you go:

calf - 15
thigh - 23.5
hips - 38.5
waist - 32.5
chest 30.5
bust - 37.5
arms 12
weight - unknown - I still don’t have a scale.

So, before I go look at my old numbers and see that very little has changed (well, that’s what happened last time I did this and I was a little disappointed) for the record, I’m getting more attention from men on the street (which is a post unto itself), when I went shopping with P the clothes were much smaller in size than I’ve worn in quite some while, and the jeans I wear regularly now don’t actually have to be undone to be taken off me.
23.8.05 18:30


I dread K’vitsh reading this….

So, it has finally happened.  I’ve become one of those girls.  I’m working from the office and I am dead tired.  It’s too hot in here for tea, and besides, I don’t have any milk.  And really, what I want is a pop.  Only, I really need the caffeine right now, so gingerale won't cut it.  I stopped drinking Coke a little over a year ago – I drank tonnes, was fat and unhealthy and didn’t like having all those empty calories.


 fficeffice" />


So tonight, I bought a diet coke.


 


And it’s not that bad.


 

I know, soon I’ll be trying out for the cheerleading squad and wearing scruchies in my hair and giggling over boys.  Shudder.
30.8.05 03:07


I am just exhausted

While walking to work today – sunny, early evening, bright street – a man asked me for change.  I said I was sorry but I didn’t have any.  To which he responds “How about a fuck, then” and I ignore him.  He goes on.  This was at an intersection, of course, and he continued to talk about how we should have sex until the light changed.  I ignored him the entire time and simply thought about how if I carried a gun I would simply shot people like this in the head. 


 fficeffice" />


When I got to the office, I called to police who took my call and said they would send someone down when they had a chance.  About an hour later a cop called, said he was looking around the area.  It isn’t that I really expect anything useful to come of calling the police; I’m just tired of ignoring these assholes. 


 


A few weeks ago when K’vitsh and I were off the cinema a man stopped us and thought that he recognized me, said he was mistaken and apologized and then asked if I modeled.  He was sure I had been an artist’s model at some point.  I was pretty brusk and annoyed.  Then on Sunday while she and I were walking – in a different area of down town – we chatted briefly with a guy about his dog and he started in on the same thing – have I modeled, would I model, ad naseum.  She figures it’s the same guy.


 


And I’m just annoyed.  Each time I’ve been walking during the day – lots of light – and it isn’t like I’m dressing for attention – tonight I’m wearing baggy jeans and a hoodie – but these guys seem to think that they not only have some right to talk to me, the one tonight was bloody lewd.  WTF? 


 

I’m still not sure about how I feel.  Part of me is just pissed off – what right does this guy have? But there is also a voice in my head that says the more I work out, the more this will happen.  Not because I think I’m asking for it, but because these guys think that pretty girls want attention.  You know, like fat girls don’t, or that any girl appreciates this kind of attention. 
31.8.05 03:19


shock.

Jim and I were working out yesterday, doing what he refers to as conditioning and I call living hell.  Afterward, we were doing this thing that involves kicking and punching and hoping and sprawls and lifting a medicine ball.  I wound up with broken glasses and a very chagrined Jim.


 fficeffice" />


It occurred to me when I put on my old pair that they are the only pair I have ever owned that I didn’t break.  As a kid I went thru about a pair a year – in part because of the prescription changes but also ‘cause I was a graceless little fuck who kept running around.  With this old pair of specks I also gained about 50 lbs.  I know there isn’t a direct correlation, but part of me was thinking that I must be doing something right, breaking another pair of glasses.  While being active, no less


 


The part that I find most amusing about this is people’s reactions when I tell them what happened.  Everyone laughs.  Everyone.  My sweetie.  K’vitsh.  P was laughing so hard she had trouble breathing.  My boss at the bar thought it was hilarious.  Jim feels bad, but I tried to convince him I was pretty sure from the day I stepped in to the gym that this was bound to happen. 


 

The replacement frames will be here tomorrow or Thursday.  I’ve also ordered contacts so that this doesn’t happen again soon. 
31.8.05 04:37


powered by
20six.co.uk